Lessons of a Vietnam Helicopter Crewman
1. Once you are in the
fight, it is way too late to wonder if this is a good idea.
2. Helicopters are
cool!
3. It is a fact that
helicopter tail rotors are instinctively drawn toward trees, stumps, rocks,
etc. While it may be possible to ward off this natural event some of the time,
it cannot, despite the best efforts of the crew, always be prevented. It's just
what they do.
4. NEVER get into a
fight without more ammunition than the other guy.
5. The engine RPM, and
the rotor RPM, must BOTH be kept in the GREEN. Failure to heed this commandment
can affect the morale of the crew.
6. A billfold in your
hip pocket can numb your leg and be a real pain in the ass.
7. Cover your Buddy,
so he can be around to cover you.
8. Letters from home
are not always great.
9. The madness of war
can extract a heavy toll. Please have exact change.
10. Share everything.
Even the Pound Cake.
11. Decisions made by
someone over your head will seldom be in your best interest.
12. The terms
"Protective Armor" and "Helicopter" are mutually exclusive.
13. The further away
you are from your friends, the less likely it is that they can help you when
you really need them the most.
14. Sometimes, being
good and lucky still was not enough. There is always payback.
15. "Chicken
Plates" are not something you order in a restaurant.
16. If everything is
as clear as a bell, and everything is going exactly as planned, you're about to
be surprised.
17. The BSR (Bang
Stare Read) Theory states that the louder the sudden bang in the helicopter,
the quicker your eyes will be drawn to the gauges.
18. The longer you
stare at the gauges, the less time it takes them to move from green to red.
19. It does too get
cold in Vietnam.
20. No matter what you
do, the bullet with your name on it will get you. So too can the ones addressed
"To Whom It May Concern".
21. Gravity: It may
not be fair, but it is the law.
22. If the rear
echelon troops are really happy, the front line troops probably do not have what
they need.
23. If you are wearing
body armor, the incoming will probably miss that part.
24. It hurts less to
die with a uniform on than to die in a hospital bed.
25. Happiness is a
belt-fed weapon.
26. If something
hasn't broken on your helicopter, it's about to.
27. Eat when you can.
Sleep when you can. Vist the head when you can. The next opportunity may not
come around for a long time. If ever.
28. Combat pay is a
flawed concept.
29. Having all your
body parts intact and functioning at the end of the day beats the alternative.
30. Air superiority is
NOT a luxury.
31. If you are
allergic to lead it is best to avoid a war zone.
32. It is a bad thing
to run out of airspeed, altitude, and ideas all at the same time.
32a. Nothing is as
useless as altitude above you and runway behind you.
33. While the rest of
the crew may be in the same predicament, it's almost always the pilot's job to
arrive at the crash site first.
34. When you shoot
your gun, clean it the first chance you get.
35. Loud sudden noises
in a helicopter WILL get your undivided attention.
36. Hot garrison chow
is better than hot C-rations, which, in turn is better than cold C-rations,
which is better than no food at all. All of these, however, are preferable to
cold rice balls (given to you by guards) even if they do have the little pieces
of fish in them.
37. WHAT is often more
important than WHY.
38. Boxes of cookies
from home must be shared.
39. Girlfriends are
fair game. Wives are not.
40. Everybody's a hero
on the ground in the club after the fourth drink.
41. There is no such
thing as a small firefight.
42. A free-fire zone
has nothing to do with economics.
43. The farther you
fly into the mountains, the louder the strange engine noises become.
44. Medals are OK, but
having your body and all your friends in one piece at the end of the day is
better.
44a. The only medal
you really want to be awarded is the Longevity Medal.
45. Being shot hurts.
46. Thousands of
Vietnam Veterans earned medals for bravery every day. A few were even awarded.
48. Running out of
pedal, fore or aft cyclic, or collective are all bad ideas. Any combination of
these can be deadly.
49. Nomex is NOT fire
proof.
50. There is only one
rule in war: When you win, you get to make up the Rules.
51. Living and dying
can both hurt a lot.
53. While a Super Bomb
could be considered one of the four essential building blocks of life, powdered
eggs cannot.
54. C-4 can make a
dull day fun.
55. Cocoa Powder is
neither.
56. There is no such
thing as a fair fight, only ones where you win or lose.
57. If you win the
battle you are entitled to the spoils. If you lose you don't care.
58. Nobody cares what
you did yesterday or what you are going to do tomorrow. What is important is
what you are doing NOW to solve our problem.
59. If you have extra,
share it quickly.
60. Always make sure
someone has a P-38.
61. A sucking chest
wound may be God's way of telling you it's time to go home.
62. Prayer may not
help . . . but it can't hurt.
63. Flying is better
than walking. Walking is better than running. Running is better than crawling.
All of these however, are better than extraction by a Med-Evac, even if this is
technically a form of flying.
64. If everyone does
not come home none of the rest of us can ever fully come home either.
65. Do not fear the
enemy, for your enemy can only take your life. It is far better that you fear
the media, for they will steal your HONOR.
66. A grunt is the
true reason for the existence of the helicopter. Every helicopter flying in
Vietnam had one real purpose: To help the grunt. It is unfortunate that many
helicopters never had the opportunity to fulfill their one true mission in life
simply because someone forgot this fact.
67. "You have the
right to remain silent" is always EXCELLENT advice.