A  number  of  Primary Schools were doing a project on "The Sea".

Kids were asked to draw pictures, or write about their experiences.
Teachers  got together to compare the results, and put together some of
the comments  that  were  funny, and some that were sad. Here are some
of them. The kids were all aged between 5 and 8 years.

This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles. (Kelly age6)


Whales are animals, not fish. If they don't get air they can drown,like
my brother did last summer. (David age 7)

Oysters balls are called pearls. (James age 6)

I don't like the sea. It makes me sick on the ferry. (Peter age 6)

My goldfish died. Why? (Katie age 5)

If  you  are surrounded by sea you are an Island. If you don't have sea
all round you, you are in continent. (Wayne age 7)

I  think  sharks  are  ugly  and  mean, and have big teeth, justlike
Emily Richardson. She's not my friend no more. (Kylie age 6)

A  dolphin  breaths through an arsehole on the top of it's head.(Billy
age 8)

My uncle goes out in his boat with pots, and comes back with crabs.
(Millie age 6)

When  ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross the
ocean. Sometimes, when the wind didn't blow, the sailors would whistle
to make the wind  come. My brother said they would be better off eating
beans. (William age 7)

I  like  mermaids. They are beautiful, and I like their shiny tails.How
do mermaids get pregnant? (Helen age 6)

I'm  not  going to write about the sea. My baby brother is always
screaming and being sick, my Dad keeps shouting at my Mum, and my big
sister has just got pregnant, so I can't think what to write. (Amyage
6)

Some fish are dangerous. Jelly fish can sting. Electric eels can give
you a shock.  They have to live in caves under the sea where I think
they have to plug themselves into chargers. (Christopher age 7)

My mum has fish nets, but doesn't catch any fish. (Laura age 5)

When  you  go  swimming  in the sea, it is very cold, and it makes my
willy small. (Kevin age 6)

When  me  and  Sarah went to the sea side in the summer holidays, we hid
in the  sand  dunes and watched my big sister doing it with her boy
friend. It was fun. (Lauren age 7)

A  submarine  goes  under  the water like a fish, but it has lots of
seamen inside. (Emma age 5)

When  I  grow  up,  I  want  to  be captain of a big ship, and have lots
of sailors  (Valerie age 6)

Divers  have  to  be safe when they go under the water. Two divers can't
go down alone, so they have to go down on each other. (Becky age 8)

On holiday my Mum went water ski-ing. She fell off when she wasgoing
very fast. She says she won't do it again because water shot up her
fanny.